This topic in our mind development series takes a look at frustration. There are a myriad of reasons for feeling frustration and l will be looking at the most common reasons and how to resolve those feelings.
PLANNING AHEAD CIRCUMVENTS FRUSTRATION
Being proactive helps us to gain control and eliminate some causes of frustration e.g. If I want to take a trip to Venice, I plan what needs to happen for me to get there. I plan what bus, plane, trains I need to take and at what times and at what cost and where I will stay when I get there. This eliminates most possible frustrations because you have planned well.
There might be uavoidable delays which caused you to miss your train which had other knock on effects….Accept that this is life and we need to build this into the equation too. I think you see where I am going. Plan What, How and When as much as you can. Some of us will you get mad at the weather because it rained on your special day. Yet we know we cannot rail against nature or things outside of our control. There simply is no logical benefit in doing do. “it is what it is” in most cases.
FRUSTRATION THROUGH THE UNKNOWN
Sometimes we become stressed and frustrated simply because we are at a loss as to how to achieve an aim. Fortunately, most of the time someone has already done what we are struggling to achieve. Are you stuck with some functionality on your ipad that makes you want to smash the device? Might the solution lie in researching some of the videos on google? Might the solution lie in asking a friend or neighbour for assistance. Perhaps the problem can only be resolved by a highly qualified professional. Seek assistance in this direction if necessary.
Believe it or not we all have the street smarts to cope with anything, but somehow, somewhere along the line we adopted a false narrative that told us that we could not cope, so when we believe that false narrative we became fearful, afraid because we thought we did not know what we were going to do, we thought we would not be able to cope, we thought once lost we would stay lost, we thought we would never get a new job, never progress.
What crept into your thoughts way in the background was negativity and fear. So again stay calm and remember You can cope with everything that life throws at you.
SOMETIMES WE JUST NEED TO BE PATIENT
Just pause and make a new plan and remind yourself that you can handle these temporary setbacks. They are always temporary setbacks. If you take the time to look back at the last time you were frustrated about something, say a year ago most likely it resolved itself or you found a way out.
It is also lack of self belief that causes the frustration. Again, If a journey or task we have undertaken is new this may cause uncertainty. If we are perhaps stepping up a level from where we once were, this too can cause uncertainty and frustration should we become stuck. Remember though, that the path from A to B is not necessarily a straight line. Sometimes a detour is necessary as we learn a new skill or travel a new route.
Dont be afraid of the unknown. Dont be afraid of failure. You first have to fail at something in order to succeed! It feels horrible having failed. It feels horrible if it looks like we are going to fail. But it takes a little bit of courage to recognise that failure is the stepping stone to success. Therefore there is no need to be frustrated for this reason. Repeat. It is ok to fail! All successful people have failed on their way to mini and major goals. Your path to success might be a curve or even a circle rather than a straight line. Accept this and just keep moving.
ARE WE PUTTING OTHER PEOPLE’S NEEDS AHEAD OF OUR OWN
We have one body, one mind, but the demands for our attention physically and emotionally can be a bit much at times. This can happen if we are raising children, caring for an elderly family member or we simply have a crazy maker in our lives. You know when You are feeling stressed and feel like you are unable to cope that can and does lead to frustration. It simply means your own needs are not being met! If we have a lot of responsibilities we can be left feeling a little guilty for needing and wanting to just stop. The fleeting feeling that you need a break may be lost on you due to the guilty feelings you have to just restvand say no once in a while. You need time out and the unapologetic attitude that goes with it. If we are unable or unwilling to take care of ourselves, exhaustion sickness and frustration are the results. It is a vicious circle when we do not first care for our own needs. Therefore beloved one do take time out with the assistance of friends, family, co-workers. Take whatever assistance you can get to nourish yourself and your body and mind will automatically heal.
Peace and love