When You Judge

When you judge someone to be horrid, unsavoury, or whatever adjective you wish to use, is it pain you are actually seeing. We can misinterpret pain as being something that it is not.

Quite often what we are actually seeing is someone elses pain. But we misunderstand. We actually judge because that is our own pain being triggered. Like a baby that begins to cry when it senses the stress of its mother, or the anger of its mother. It fails to understand pain and it seems to draw in that pain rather than understand it.

This is my challenge to you, can you see through the eyes of love compassion and understanding? Can you observe the pain of another without being drawn into their pain.

In some relationships this type of relationship mirroring is called co dependency. It occurs from infancy to adulthood throughout our lives. It happens briefly with people wee have seen briefly or as I have said before with people we are in relationships with.

When we know ourselves we can know others. Ask yourself this. Have you ever mistreated or behaved badly when you were in pain? I would like to guess that at some point you have. We are human we the same flaws after all. This is why in the bible it talks about one not being able to cast the first stone at the prostitute. Because they were all guilty or sinful in some way or another.

When you can just observe without being drawn into another’s pain this can be a great meditative practice. No mind is active so to speak. The first thing is bring aware that we behave in such a fashion in the first place.

Remember we are not living in another person’s shoes, we dont know what is making them reactive and if we react in kind even mentally and not necessarily outwardly we do ourselves injustice.

We each know when we are being judged even when words are not spoken, I guess this is our inner psychic. And it is not nice. So again I challenge you to observe and see through someones pain without being carried along by it. They might be challenging you to go to the dark side. Accompanying them to the dark side by joining in there anger, hate malice does neither party any justice. Least of all the “victim”. (I mean the one that should be observing rather than taking part in the pain party). Stand aside it is not for you, it is for the drunken sailors that are completely out of it, they have become intoxicated by their pain and taken over by their pain. Do you really want to participate in that? No thank you should be your resounding response.

Live in peace and in love and your joy will grow. Your understanding of yourself and of human nature will grow. You do not need yo be a Christian, a Buddhist or any of the religious labels to see the truth that is in front of you. You simply need to be honest to yourself. Do the right thing. Do not get caught up in bullying …that again is like joining the intoxicated party of unconscious people. Allowing pain to rule is absurd.

Live in peace, be happy and greater things will be attracted to you. Live in disharmony and you will attract more of the same. The choice is for us to make.


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *